True but thats because hes a fetus.
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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