if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
