And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
