when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
