That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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