I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
