hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
