hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
