I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
