ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
