How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
