just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I am spending my child support on dildos
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
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