Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize