What a fucking waste of an outfit
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
True strength comes from lack of pants
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
