I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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