i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
