So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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