I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
