Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
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