Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
