They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
