She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize