whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
