i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
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