What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
