She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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