All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
