no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
