Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
