I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Randomize
