I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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