he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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