You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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