i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
She's like a pop up book from hell.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
