So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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