I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Randomize
