oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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