Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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