32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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