Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize