belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Hello my rib-scented angel!
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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