what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
