forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
