I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
