I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
