She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
