Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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