This girl is more easily done than said...
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
my being single is dangerous.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
