wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
