apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
